Our Operations Manager, Jess, takes the pen to share what she’s learned balancing her new normal as both a parent and professional with lessons that can teach each of us, regardless of our circumstances.
Becoming a new working mom has been one of the most beautiful and challenging experiences of my life. The balancing act between career and motherhood has felt overwhelming at times, but it’s been a journey that has taught me to be kinder to myself, more intentional with my time, and to develop new habits that work for my new normal. Along the way, I’ve discovered that managing overwhelm requires patience, grace, and intentionality.
Here are a few valuable lessons I’ve learned in this beautiful, chaotic season of life:
😮💨 Let Go of Perfection… No, Really.
I admit it. I’m a recovering perfectionist. The kind who knows intellectually that perfection doesn’t exist and still emotionally invests in successful outcomes. I didn’t think I needed to do it all— but what I did, I wanted to do perfectly.
The reality is, striving for perfection, no matter how big or small the task, is exhausting and unsustainable. I’ve learned to give myself grace and recognize that "good enough" is sometimes the best I can offer—and that’s okay. At work, this means letting go of the need to over-deliver on every project. I still give my all, but I’ve learned to prioritize, ask for help, and manage my energy. At home, this looks like ordering takeout and leaving last night’s dishes in the sink if it means I get to enjoy some quality time with my little one.
And as a Black woman, l, like some of you, have felt the added pressure to constantly “show up” at work in ways that prove my value, but I’ve learned that I can still deliver excellent work without sacrificing my peace. Learning to release the need for perfection has been liberating—it allows me to focus on what really matters without carrying the weight of unrealistic expectations.
🙅🏽♀️ Set Boundaries Without Guilt
As parents and professionals, we can often feel like we have to be everything to everyone. But I’ve learned that setting boundaries is not just necessary—it’s a form of self-care. Whether it’s blocking off time at work for focused tasks or scheduling moments of quiet at home, these boundaries help me protect my mental space. Internally, learning to say yes or no with my full body kept me honest and hone my discernment. Externally, I’m better able to communicate my values, non-negotiables, and areas of growth.
Bottom line: Boundaries don’t make us less committed—they make us more effective.
👐🏾 Ask for Help and Build a Village
I’ve learned the power of asking for help and building a strong support network. Whether it’s leaning on family for childcare, reaching out to friends for emotional support, or delegating tasks to coworkers, it’s okay to not have all the answers or all the energy, all the time.
At work, this looks like trusting my team and knowing that I don’t have to bear every responsibility alone- even the tasks squarely in my wheelhouse. In fact, I share many of my moments of overwhelm with trusted colleagues so they know how and when to support me. We’ve had the opportunity to put our “I got you” culture to the test at Leading Elephants and its success has been an important contributor to my overall mental health. At home, I’ve learned that asking for help doesn’t mean I’m failing as a mom—it means I’m human. There is no medal for carrying both the emotional and physical load without complaint. True strength comes from knowing when to ask for support and when to take a step back to recharge.
🥰 Prioritize Self-Care
Self-care isn’t just about spa days or vacations—though those are nice! It’s also about making time to recharge, even in small ways. I’ve realized that I can’t pour from an empty cup, and when I neglect my own needs, I’m not showing up as my best self in any area of my life. Whether it’s taking 10 minutes to breathe deeply before a hectic day starts or sharing my truth and boundaries when something feels overwhelming, I make space for myself. Prioritizing self-care reminds me that I deserve rest, joy, and fulfillment just as much as anyone else. This practice has been essential in maintaining my mental and emotional health, so I can keep showing up as my authentic self, both at work and at home.
🐛 Embrace Flexibility
No matter how much you plan, life with kids is unpredictable. I’ve learned to let go of perfectionism and embrace flexibility. Some days don’t go as planned, and I survive. This lesson has helped me stay resilient. At work, this has taught me to pivot quickly when things don’t go according to plan. I’ve learned that being rigid only leads to frustration, while flexibility allows me to find solutions more easily. I’m able to ask myself, “Is there another way to do this?” “Is someone asking me to compromise some part of my identity, values or beliefs… or is this just a meeting in the middle?” “Am I married to a certain result or is there room to dream of something different?”
At home, I’m able to appreciate the different ways my husband and I care for our son instead of holding him (and myself) to unrealistic standards and expectations. This allows harmony and partnership to win out over frustration and stress.
Flexibility helps me manage my emotions, be creative and collaborative, and it helps me to find balance, even when things feel chaotic.
Summing it All Up
When you accept that the world is messy and it's okay to be human, you can give the appropriate weight and attention to the tasks at hand. You can meet the moment as the best, most authentic version of yourself without self-deprecating inner dialogue or false outside messages that tell you there’s not enough time, support, or resources to go around. The truth is you likely have everything you need to fight the forces of overwhelm and (with these little reminders) you can enjoy life with more grace, connection, and joy.
You can stop to take a breath and maybe witness something really beautiful.
What a gift that could be. ✨